Complete parenting failure

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I’ve got to admit that i didn’t see this one coming.  I thought that I’d been staying on top of my oldest boys schoolwork.  His report card, delivered Yesterday, tells a different story altogether.  Instead of finding that he’d managed to pull himself out of academic suicide, the numbers prove the opposite.  He’s failing the sixth grade.

Had he been bothered at all by this, it might have been easier to handle.  Unfortunately it felt like I was sitting in a courtroom with a convicted felon who had no remorse for his crimes.  My son simply does not care if he fails.  As a matter of fact, he thinks that good grades are the sign of a weak individual.  His feelings on the subject are that “Cool kids don’t get good grades, only nerds and wusses do.”

Honestly, I don’t know what has had to happen to a kid his age to cause this attitude.  i haven’t been around while his mother relationship fell apart.  I’m not aware of everything, I don’t know that I want to be fully aware of everything.  I’m just left to pick up the pieces and try to put my kids back together.

All the while, I have to blame myself.  He’s gone through all the motions of doing his homework, but apparently only has just been scribbling random words on the page unless he thought I would be looking.  this is most definitely a failure on my part.  I got complacent and he took advantage of that complacency.  It is, after all, a child’s job to try to get away with things.  As a parent, I should have been there to make sure it didn’t happen.  I wasn’.

Monday will find me scheduling appointments with teachers and discovering if there is any chance that my son can graduate the sixth grade.  Routines at home have been modified to ensure that schoolwork is the only focus he will have until evidence points towards improvement rather than a complete disregard for his own future.  It may be a case of better late than never, or it may be a case of too little to late, but it’s all his mother or I can do at this point.

Peace.  I’m out

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Finally out of the funk

The scene above has been common in the Russell house for the past several weeks.  first it was a nasty cold that wouldn’t let anyone go, then I managed to contract a rather serious infection that dropped me like a rock for a full week and a half.  As it stands now the entire house is in catch up mode, from laundry to dusting.  Nobody has had the energy to do it.

It hasn’t just been me who’s been under the weather.  All three boys have been sick at one time or another.  If not they were all sick at once, which makes for a really fun day when you’re a father who’s already feeling like he’s taken a bullet to the leg that’s gotten infected.

Through it all I’ve managed to keep the basics of the house running.  Kids have gone to school, done homework, eaten the best dinners I could give them even though I spent a week sleeping the better part of 18 hours per day.  In short, i soldiered on, but the bulk of the housework suffered.

In that time our lil’ guy has begun speaking more and more.  he’s forming sentences and opinions of his own and, like all three year olds, is pushing for a bit of independence.  It’s life as usual, except that the kid that never spoke is now just the kid that doesn’t speak very well.

As far as his school goes, he’s doing very well.  He’s begun to take an interest in potty training as well, which thrills both me and my wallet.

As for the oldest boy… well, I have my hands full there, but that’s the subject of another post entirely, because honestly I could use some parenting pointers on that one.

Back o the youngest and his school reports.  I’m woefully behind on those, and since his other very much looks forward to them, I’m going to run them down in order here just to get caught up.  he really has made some huge strides over the past few weeks!

2-11-10: Great Day.  got right back into the routine of things.  He told a staff he had to go potty (gave a toilet picture to her). She took him in the bathroom and he sat on the oilet a long time and tried to go.  hopefully toilet training will be soon.

note: he’s been trying on-and-off at home, too

2-12-10: Good day. we’re working hard on getting him to play with peers.

note: Strange that it’s difficult for them there.  He plays fine with all the neighborhood kids, especially the older ones.

2-16-10: great morning. He said “Happy, happy, happy”.  i said, “Are you happy?” He answered back, “happy, I’m happy.”

2-17-10: Head strong today.  Everything was “No.” After short time delays he would do what he needed to do.

2-18-10: Still a few “no’s” but better today.  He talks all the time and verbally communicates with us very well.

note: this is nice-teacher talk for “never shuts up”.  Not that we’re complaining!

2-19-10: Good morning.  Started with “no’s” this afternoon. He looked tired during music time.  He does all the hand motions to the songs.

note: he fell asleep shortly after getting home that day… Hence the photo above.

2-22-10: Great day.  he followed directions very well. he is starting to show more interest in his peers.

note: He was a complete pain in the ass when he got home that day…  Must have used up all his great day vibes at school…

2-23-10: Very much into art today.  He requested dot art, markers, coloring books, gluing. We need more diapers for him.

2-24-10: Great day. Talked all day nonstop.

And I’m surprised by this because…

2-25-10: Loves helping to set up the individual scheduled the students have. He is very visual and will follow the schedule indepenently.

Yep.  loves helping around the house, too.  Especially if it means he has the chance to mess with the trash!

1-26-10: Very good mood.  Still working hard to get him to interact with other students.

I hope they do better with him and his classmates, but he was in a great mood this afternoon, communicated well, then fell asleep at 4:30.  he’s currently sleeping peacefully and I have no intention of waking him.

He’s just too cute when he’s sleeping!

Peace. I’m out.

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Sick Days

I haven’t had the time or energy to post a lot here over the past few days.  Lil’ B. is home sick with a nasty cough and low grade fever and his brothers have decided to turn their attentions to killing each other of before heir next birthdays roll around.  For the most part I’m just trying to hold a routine together; a nearly impossible task with a sick three year-old, let alone a sick autistic three year-old.

At the moment blogging is a fever-pitched thing punctuated by the sound of a small cough, which sends “Dad” to his bedroom door to see if he is still sleeping or if I need to spend some time sitting with him while he dozes off again.  It’s not quite bad enough for a doctor visit, bit if it hods on another day or two, I’m going to call that necessary.

I’ll do my best to get something more cohesive put up here later today or tomorrow, but for now I’m on sick kid duty, so my time is limited.

Peace. I’m out.

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